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CONTACT Mod 7 Part 2 - Take it to the Next Level - Find Common Intention and get commitment and agreement

May 17, 2019
 

Hi everybody. This video is part 2 of step 7 in CONTACT. The last step.  Congratulations. You’ve come along away. Good job.

Like I said, The 2nd ‘T’ in CONTACT stands for Take it to the next level — find common intention and get agreement and a commitment.

In this video I’ll share an example of finding common intention in a mediation setting. It’s your mediation lesson.

I’m going to give you a great 6 step process for mediating and taking all conversations to the next level. I’ll share how to get the agreement and solidify the commitment.

I once mediated a situation on a construction site where a one guy was bullying another.

The secondary intention of the bully was to make the newer, good employee, embarrassed, feeling guilty and angry to get him to shift what he was doing.

He teased him, called him names, and made him feel like quitting. The superintendent wanted to keep both people. He asked me to mediate.

The secondary...

CONTACT Mod 7 Part 1 - Take it to the Next Level - Find Common Intention and get commitment and agreement

May 09, 2019
 

Hi everybody. This video is part 1 of step 7 in CONTACT. The last step.  2nd ‘T’ in CONTACT stands for Take it to the next level — find common intention and get a commitment.

You’ll learn all about the Power of Common Intention in this video and the difference between primary and secondary intentions, and in Part 2 of Taking it to the next level you’ll learn how to solidify commitments and get a lesson on mediating using a 6 step framework.

How do you find common intention when things seem so far apart and the energy is very high? It’s a process that takes time, patience and some deeper understanding of what intentions are.

If you’ve followed the first 6 steps in CONTACT effectively, choosing the right words at the right time, using healthy listening skills and strong clarifying, you’re almost there. You might even already have done some of it.

Before we go further into understanding intention, I want to make this note: Be careful...

CONTACT part 2 of step 6 Finding Common Ground

Apr 17, 2019
 

Hi everybody. This video is part 2 of step 6 in CONTACT. Like I said, The 2nd ‘C’ in CONTACT stands for Common Ground — find it and get each person in the ‘yes’ frame of mind.  In this video I’ll give you the last 7 steps of Finding Common ground using CONTACT.

I’m going to get you to take the idea of seeking first to understand then to be understood to another level in this video to really make a difference in how you communicate and get people to engage in those tough conversations.

Here’s the overview and then some details. From the last video, Step 1 is to break the ice with some lighter conversation. Step 2 is to get agreement on how people communicate and then to agree to use the HIP as a navigation tool for the conversation.

Step 3 in finding common ground is to become Conscious of your own HIP. Step 4. Out yourself wisely. Step 5. Notice them. 6. Tune in. Actively listen

Step 7 in finding common ground is to Affirm and...

CONTACT Module 5 - Affirm and clarify - use reflective listening

Mar 15, 2019
 

Hi everybody. This video is about step 5 in CONTACT. A in CONTACT stands for Affirm and clarify what you heard, to be sure you got it right. Use reflective listening to make sure you truly understand before you seek to be understood and to find common ground.

What is reflective listening? Wikipedia.org states it’s a communication strategy involving two key steps: 1, seeking to understand a speaker's idea, then 2, offering the idea back to the speaker, to confirm the idea has been understood correctly. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reflective_listening

In effective communications, we want to avoid the temptation to respond from our own frame of reference, before we get clear on the other person. I’m going to give you 3 techniques for reflective listening.

Because I want you to know how to get the other person’s story right. We want to affirm and clarify what we’ve heard and witnessed, and get our interpretations correct. We want to make sure...

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